And the winners of the Goodreads giveaway are....

Adele from Albanvale, Victoria, AU

Vicki from Rockville, Maryland, USA

Beth from Plymouth, Massachusetts, USA

Anna from Fenton Missouri, USA

Robin from Laguna Beach, California, USA


Congratulations, your books are on their way!

This year, I'm taller than the sunflowers...and sadly, I don't have very many of them, it's this crappy cold and rainy summer we're having...

As you can see, Crouching Tigger-Hidden Pooh has found plenty of catnip...
I have so much catnip in the garden it's no wonder I don't have every cat in the county in my yard...
I was chasing flutter-byes yesterday...the Tiger and Admiral settled happily on the Cone Flowers (they're doing just fine in spite of the weather!)
My weedy garden...
This is Love in the Mist...I have no idea how I got it in my garden, probably came in a mixed packet that I sprinkled around once...I really love this little white flower!

Close up of Love in the Mist blooming...

When I wasn't chasing flutter-byes and photographing flowers yesterday (it was a rare, hot summer day yesterday, it was GORGEOUS!) I was painting on my portable studio table (I'll post pictures of that over at Follow Your Bliss) and working on The Fractured Hues of White Light...I'm visiting with chapter 3 (again) and juggled some sentences around (again)...there's a paragraph that I'd like to find a new home for, but it seems happy right where it is this morning...I'll leave it alone for now. I'll read the rest of the chapter today...it's really come together quite nicely...

My Goodreads giveaway of Dusty Waters: A Ghost Story ends midnight tonight! I'm so thrilled with the response that it has gotten...I really don't know what it means yet, but I intend to keep muddling along in search of readers...

Thanks for stopping by!

Looking out the window, it's hard to tell if it's going to rain or not...the prevalent gray has come back, tho' it's warmer (mid-70's already), thunderstorms likely later with another cold front passing through...(psst...we don't need any more rain, I wish it would rain somewhere else, preferably somewhere that needs it!)

...And that's the way it is...November 4, 1916-July 17, 2009

(Photo from CBS photo archive)

"Old anchormen don't fade away, they just keep coming back for more." And so he did. I got a sense that he enjoyed his retirement away from the anchorman's desk...what a good life...and it was extra special because he was willing to share it with us. The man had class, he was a professional through and through, he was part of the family, he gave us the news, good or bad, that recognizable voice was reassuring even during our most bleakest times. Not only was he the most trusted man in American, he was one of the most respected, and he earned that respect because he respected us...I would never dream of yelling at the television while he delivered the news. (Tho' I would never yell at Jim Lehrer either.) Walter Cronkite was a tough act to follow...but you know, thankfully, people are unique, and have their way of doing things, their way of being, and thank goodness we had Uncle Walter delivering the news while he did...he served us well, and he was an inspiration for many. Walter Cronkite is in the field on assignment...

Sunday afternoon...

Yesterday was a very busy day for me, a book signing in Johnson City NY, then a Gallery closing reception in Syracuse, they overlapped and we (my Fred and I) made it to both, I'm exhausted today...but I did enjoy a bit of sunshine on the porch early this morning, with my laptop in lap, a cup of coffee, and my doggy buddy, Max, at my feet (his black fur smelling sunshine sweet!) The humming birds were buzzing the bee balm, at one point three were buzzing quietly together in the same clump of balm...well, until they bumped into each other and they started to squabble, chipping and spraying poop at each other...good grief!

My flower garden is looking wild from all the rain, and because of my back, I can't do the maintenance that I usually do to tame it...but the photo opportunities have still been a delight!

Along with my self-promotion of Dusty Waters through Good Reads, I've been working pretty steady on The Fractured Hues of White Light, I'd really like to get it ready to publish sometime in August or September...but I keep fussing around with chapter 3...it's a good kind of fussing because I'm tying up loose ends and filling in a crucial time in my character Sylvester's life that also has an influence in two of my other novels, and it's sort of helping me write the one currently named Wish, which has been "on hold" for nearly two years...

Allow me to explain, the nifty thing about my books is this interconnection of the characters...the books are individuals, they're not written to be read in any order or anything like that...but the characters know one another, their lives overlap in a variety of ways...just like life, people know one another, sometimes briefly, sometimes longer (or forever)...life goes on for these people after the novel is finished...they show up in the background of another story, moving on beyond their story...or in a time or place before...depends on which book...but the familiarity is there...a community...it's been growing for a long time...

So...White Light...yes, this odd book about the autistic artist Samantha Ryder...I do love this book, it only gets better with every visit...it's my garden that I'm tending this summer...she's bloomed to 520 pages (at one point during the early drafts she was tipping into 600 pages, so she's "streamlined" now...) I'm immersed into this world for now, and I'll know when she's ready to go to print...just not yet! I'm going to take my sweet old time!

A rain soaked rose, ain't she lovely?

The turtle...

My Fred carved this little turtle for me out of a chip of alabaster...he's so sweet (both of them, the turtle and my Fred!)

This is an old photo of me holding one of the orphan bunnies that we helped "get bigger" before releasing it back to the wild, what a pleasure to hold this tiny life in my hands and have it not be afraid of me, sweet little thing! I haven't had one yet this year, but they're around, growing into bigger bunnies...I've kept Max's nosy-nose out of the weeds so he isn't picking them up and bringing them to me (he's very gentle with them, such a good boy)...and I've been very "cruel" by keeping the cats inside until the babies are bigger...I can't bear hearing that pitiful cry as Crouching Tigger-Hidden Pooh carries one off, it breaks my heart...(Tiggy-Pooh is right here, eyes cracked open as if he KNOWS I'm writing about him!)

Go back to sleep kitties, it's windy outside...(that is the doggy bed...but the doggy never gets to sleep on it!)

Anyway...back to the turtle...I loved the tale of the tortoise and the hare way back...and still do...I've always been of the turtle sensibility through much of my time...slow-pokey toes, easy as she goes, living inside a protective shell...withdrawing when under threat, not sticking my neck out until it's safe...it's usually when I behave like a silly bunny that's when I get the smack down...know what I mean, jellybean? Been there, done that, got crap on my new t-shirt...

I've been immersed in editing my novel The Fractured Hues of White Light since March...and I believe it's as close to being publishable as it ever will be...I'm tempted to read it through one more time before turning it over to my Fred for him to do his design voo-doo to "make it so"...I'm grappling with the cover...I want to use a drawing...but I know color is important...so something that might fade from a stream of consciousness sketchbook doodle on the back to the glory of color on the front might be the way to go...the spine might be a "rainbow" of color...not sure...the brain is working it out...I'm kinda stuck on yellow being the main color...I have a few ideas...a few...I need to slop some watercolor around and see what happens...

I've been intrigued by this weeks NEWSWEEK...WHAT TO READ NOW...the fifty books that make sense of our times is chock full of suggested reading that might not normally make it on any top fifty, maybe the top 100 or 200 (if there's such a thing as a top 200)...and I loved The Write Stuff by Jon Meacham in which writers have their say in an honest roundtable conversation about writing and being published... Susan Orlean said the first book she bought on Kindle was by...Susan Orlean. (Of course it was, I'd do the same thing and be tickled pink that I could do it! Wouldn't you? Is it so terrible to want to exhibit some pride in what you do?) The conversation is similar to the series of conversations with editors and agents that I've read in Poets and Writers lately...all very informative, all very exciting...and at times disheartening...it's sometimes a real mood swing reading this stuff while being a writer...

The Now, Read it Again article by David Gates about revisiting favorite books is also a treat...and I especially loved reading The Reluctant Poet Laureate by Louisa Thomas about Kay Ryan, that one seemed extra special because I love her poem Turtle (yes, we're back to the turtle) the article quoted a piece of it...and I'm going to quote it here:

She lives/ below luck-level, never imagining/ some lottery will change her load of pottery to wings./ Her only levity is patience,/ the sport of truly chastened things.

Oh, yes...YES. My sentiments exactly...you see, I have some metaphorical crap on my new t-shirt because now that I'm really doing something with my books, self-publishing them as a publisher (Field Stone Press has started to receive junk mail, YAY!) and I've invested in a advertising campaign on Good Reads, and I'm doing a giveaway of 5 copies of Dusty Waters (ends on July 27th, click the icon on the side bar to check it out or join in!) I'm very excited by all of this progress that I'm making...and freaking out too because I've poked my head out a little more than I'm used to...I mean, jeepers creepers, people are buying my book, people are reading it...OMG imagine that! I'm still in the red...no profit yet, but that's okay, really, I never expected to make millions of dollars (not in a million years.) Maybe, just maybe, someone other than my son will post a review on Amazon.com...maybe...maybe...maybe...maybe the book will be banned or publicly burned (torches and pitchforks, oh, my)...wouldn't that be sweet? Well, maybe not (she tucks her head inside).

There's a whole lot of maybes...I completely understand Kay Ryan's reluctance to be in the position of representing 'capital-P Poetry'...I've spent plenty of time huddled over my creativity, always hiding what I was working on within the protective cradle-curve of my arm, fearing that the stray glance would see it and somehow they'd ruin it by noticing it...fearing the opinion of others, fearing someone would accuse me of being a "show off"...sometimes living up to the expectations of others is more than I can stand...or good grief, being a role model...holy shit, that's a lot of responsibility! (I'm relieved to read in Joyce Carol Oates journal that she often feels stunned by it too: "...might be that I am embarrassed at taking credit for whatever I do. If it's good I am embarrassed; if considered bad, embarrassed. By attributing my work to forces beyond my control I am distanced from it. I think that, briefly, explains the falsifications I have loved so dearly. Innocence masking experience.")

Anyway...I just want to write my books, get them out there into the hands of people who would like to read the experience between the covers, and I want to do it honestly...I don't know if they're going to like what they read or not...I can't apologize if they don't...I writes it as I sees it, okay? I made it up...half the time it surprises me what I write, so...ah, whatever...I can't please everybody...I just hope people will read my work with an open mind...

Like I said earlier, I'm agonizing over what to do for the cover of White Light, and NEWSWEEK had an article about that too...My Favorite Covers by Chip Kidd... and Poets and Writers also had a great article about interior book design...loved that too...

And finally, a delightful treat, an excerpt of Homer and Langley by E. L. Doctorow...so I've started a new list on my Good Reads profile...To-Buy...

Seeing my book being added to readers "To-Read" lists is exciting...and knowing that over 200 people are vying for my 5 free copies is freaking me out (in a good way)...

It's been a week of immersion...I think I've rambled enough...

Thanks for visiting...

Bee Balm or Creepy Space Aliens...I want to believe...

Yes, I want to believe that the weather will get better so the rest of my garden will take off...grow more than weeds...I love bee balm...it just like a creepy space alien...and it's so dang gorgeous...my hummingbirds are waiting...tapping their tiny toes (listen lady, we came all this way for this garden and it's just taking for-EVER to bloom)...sorry, any day now kids...we need another string of hot days...warm nights...if there's a little more sun tomorrow...getting so close to popping out their spindly red legs!

The bunnies finished off my brussel sprouts...poop.

Busy editing The Fractured Hues of White Light today...I had chapters 3 and 13 open, side by side...my character Sylvester was talking to Jacob...it needed to be done...there was just this spot that bugged me in chapter 3, something needed to be said, and it wasn't being said, and okay...it was sort of said in 13, but it really needed to be moved to chapter 3, and something in chapter 3 needed to be moved to chapter 13, so...word juggling...it's part of the fun of being a writer...and the book only gets better from the extra effort, and I'm happy as can be about what I just did to it today...and then this also got me back to thinking about my big fat epic Washed Glass, which I plan to work on this winter (gotta have something to look forward to while the snow is up to my ass and no garden to play in...)

I'm in the process of starting a give away of Dusty Waters through Good Reads, as soon as I figure out what I gotta do...if there's anything more I gotta do in this shameless self-promotion effort, I'll get 'er done and keep you posted!

Max didn't like this little bug buzzing around him on the porch the other day, his little tongue is sticking out here because he just showed it his teeth (tho' he didn't bark), ears in full bloom...cool looking buggy-boo...
The pattern reminds me of a tribal mask...nifty...it escaped from Max, I gave the pup something else to think about before he smacked it with his paw or chewed on it...he was getting pretty upset with it "teasing" him...

One of my roses finally bloomed...darn fussy things...I love 'em tho'!

Hummingbirds...

I sat on my porch to get this shot of the little buzzer coming to the feeder...I kept the camera balanced on my stomach just above my laptop keyboard, so there was very little movement on my part to turn it on and snap the picture...this is the little lady from the nest...


Later on, looking through my dining room window, I saw her again at the milkweed (most folks would pull them as weeds, I like them for the critters who feed on them...I pull them before the seed pods pop...I think the flowers are pretty too...)

At nigh twilight, along came Mr. Ruby Throat...he buzzed there for a very long time, I kept snapping pictures from the window, then suddenly, I lost track of him in my viewer...looked up AND THERE HE WAS! Staring at me through the window giving me the stink-eye, he knew I was there, and he looked pissed, the evening sun caught the color on his throat so he looked really impressive, but I didn't get a picture of him because I was so startled (I screamed a little). My goodness...then he zipped away.

I received my box of new copies of Dusty Waters this morning (YAY!)

Tonight is the opening of Price Check: Syracuse, the group show we're in at the Delavan Art Gallery...can't wait!

Practice, Patience, Persistence...

Foggy out there...but clearing off...I'm on vacation this week and it would be nice to see the sun...I keep hearing these predictions that this year will be the year without summer...well, the way I see it...if it ain't snowing, it's summer...if it rains all summer, it's just wet...it fills my well, waters my garden. NOAA, the Farmer's Almanac, sunspots, global warming, the jet stream, volcano spew, El Nino, La Nina...whatever...weather is a crapshoot...shit happens.

I'm in the midst of making final edits of my novel The Fractured Hues of White Light...I'm looking to self-publish this book too...let's just say, I've lost confidence in the publishing industry, maybe they'll get their shit together, maybe not...it's tough to trust the consistency of agencies and editors when they can be cut loose at any time and your book can lose it's one and only advocate...so, I'm my one and only advocate (well, not really, I have my Fred too!) So Field Stone Press has happened...of course, I'm discovering that as a self-published writer, I'm shut out of many things because I'm not taken seriously...yet...

My becoming a writer has happened through practice, patience, and persistence...I don't expect to make millions of dollars doing it, but don't say I don't aim high, I do every day I sit down in front of my laptop and make things happen...some days I'm stunned by the things that I've created in spite of obstacles and frustrations...and the voices that say "You can't..." Well, I have...Dusty Waters is just the beginning...

Today I just made one small professional step by becoming an associate member of PEN American...it's part of getting "out there"...PEN is about freedom of expression...as a self-published writer, I'm all about that...

Catching up...

Tiger swallow-tail and phlox...the flutter-bye didn't land long enough for a decent shot...I like the sense of motion in this one...

Oh happy day, I'm vacation! I'm going to be gone long enough to know how it will feel to be retired...but not long enough to forget my place...yup, come June 30th, I'm going to be going bed kicking and screaming, NOOOOO, I don't wanna go back to work! Ah, well, I'll get over it...at least it will be a short week that first one back...

For now I'm catching up with myself...I'm in bed with my back being crappy, the heating pad is my best friend...the elliptical is teasing me to go for a ride (Gotta keep up your strength, lady! Come on, you know you'll feel good once you've cranked out a mile...) Oh, yes, I can put on my mp3 player, listen to three songs and jam out a mile in no time...stick a fork in me, I'm done...not now, maybe later...I need some quiet time...

As you can see, I've finally downloaded all of those pictures on my camera...
The hummingbird nest...I have yet to get a decent shot of the mommy in the nest...she buzzes me...and when she comes to the feeder, she gives me the stink-eye and then poops on me...it isn't the worst poop in the world to deal with...

The gang's all here! Just before the latest round of rain, my irises were so pretty...I'll need to do some dividing this fall...everything is soggy and saggy now...but once we dry out, there's more things to bloom, and it's going to get pretty again quick!

The softest, sweetest ears in the world belong to my Max...they're especially nice in the sunshine, he gets such a sweet smell, like being at the beach or something, I wish I could bottle it, a good dog smell...he's going to be sooooo spoiled having me at home...

I started with the flutter-bye, ending with the flutter-bye...

Honorable Mention at the 2009 New York Book Festival!

I hadn't heard a peep about it...so I checked the website...and then I started screaming, I won...OMG...not the big prize, but honorable mention...wow, not bad for a last minute entry on a whim...not a bad showing for a little self-published piece of literary fiction by an unknown writer from Upstate New York!

Why blow me down...

Entry fee...$50.00

Winning an honorable mention...priceless...

Oh Happy Day!